- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad
Saturday, April 30, 2011
Wednesday, April 27, 2011
Tuesday, April 26, 2011
The SEANtra
I am never leaving home again.
My car broke down in Firebaugh, CA yesterday on my way home from the most magical weekend of my life. I was towed to an auto shop in Mendota, which is like Rosarito,Mexico minus the hospitality. The auto shop fixed the car, then it brome down 10 miles after I left they were closed by then, so I had to be towed 80 miles away to Fresno, where I was denied rental car service for not having a utility bill.
I had a Tina Turner moment where I walked into a Holiday Inn at the Fresno airport and said "I have $100 and these shoes, and I am a day late home and I miss my dogs, and my car is broke. And I need a parking space and a room or I will be sleeping in my car in a ditch."
They gave me a room. Thank you team member,Raquel. You are Fresno's finest. Is your brother gay?
Today, I was towed to a Pep Boys to have my car fixed for an additional $500. While I was waiting, I walked to the Nissan dealership 2.5 miles away and began a 10 hour negotiation for a new car that included reimbursement for Sirius radio, a bailout on the Pep Boys repairs, and a fully loaded package.
After signing all the paperwork and agreeing to a price and finance percent, I transferred insurance, and cleaned out the truck, leaving it at pep boys 2.5 miles away.
Then they told me there was a problem.
I needed to put $1500 more down. Which I don't have. I began to cry but held back. I screamed the f word and threatened to call the police. I'd already signed the deal and been given keys. I became my mother. She was on the phone with me while I did it, and later told me she's never been prouder.
And now, I am tpro humble new owner of a Nissan SEANtra, special edition package, all black with moonroof...and buttons that control the windows. I'm rich!
This was a hard couple of days. I felt like I was in the wiz and everyone was either a good witch or a bad witch, and poppys were all over the place trying to shake me down. and by poppys I mean non-preferred tow truck drivers.
I'm so happy to be home more than anything. I missed Ralph and Cricket this trip like never before. And tonight I'm going to sleep well knowing I made it out of Hell (yes, Central California is in fact, Hell), better than when I entered it.
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad
My car broke down in Firebaugh, CA yesterday on my way home from the most magical weekend of my life. I was towed to an auto shop in Mendota, which is like Rosarito,Mexico minus the hospitality. The auto shop fixed the car, then it brome down 10 miles after I left they were closed by then, so I had to be towed 80 miles away to Fresno, where I was denied rental car service for not having a utility bill.
I had a Tina Turner moment where I walked into a Holiday Inn at the Fresno airport and said "I have $100 and these shoes, and I am a day late home and I miss my dogs, and my car is broke. And I need a parking space and a room or I will be sleeping in my car in a ditch."
They gave me a room. Thank you team member,Raquel. You are Fresno's finest. Is your brother gay?
Today, I was towed to a Pep Boys to have my car fixed for an additional $500. While I was waiting, I walked to the Nissan dealership 2.5 miles away and began a 10 hour negotiation for a new car that included reimbursement for Sirius radio, a bailout on the Pep Boys repairs, and a fully loaded package.
After signing all the paperwork and agreeing to a price and finance percent, I transferred insurance, and cleaned out the truck, leaving it at pep boys 2.5 miles away.
Then they told me there was a problem.
I needed to put $1500 more down. Which I don't have. I began to cry but held back. I screamed the f word and threatened to call the police. I'd already signed the deal and been given keys. I became my mother. She was on the phone with me while I did it, and later told me she's never been prouder.
And now, I am tpro humble new owner of a Nissan SEANtra, special edition package, all black with moonroof...and buttons that control the windows. I'm rich!
This was a hard couple of days. I felt like I was in the wiz and everyone was either a good witch or a bad witch, and poppys were all over the place trying to shake me down. and by poppys I mean non-preferred tow truck drivers.
I'm so happy to be home more than anything. I missed Ralph and Cricket this trip like never before. And tonight I'm going to sleep well knowing I made it out of Hell (yes, Central California is in fact, Hell), better than when I entered it.
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad
Friday, April 15, 2011
Britain's Got Sean
Tonight, I got to ring the Great British Happy Hour Bell at work. It ruled. The UK is a little more trashy.
Monday, April 11, 2011
My first week!
Week One of my newest fitness scam is finished as of tonight. See, I always celebrate New Years Eve on Wrestlemania Sunday, which was last weekend. So On New Years Day, April 4, 2011 I started with my 'full steam ahead' OPERATION 2007 plan.
Exercise:
This week I went to Barry's bootcamp on Friday night as usual and found a sub, whom I hated. The normal teacher is this fellow David who is like a very deep voiced Southern twink and he is fantastic. His favorite phrase is "Let's go, Baby!" and he's very supportive and happy. We love David. His replacement was your typical overdeveloped pecs and skinny-calved dub-step himbo (homo/bimbo) who probably has an online profile claiming to be masculine looking for same, all the while planning his Halloween costume as a sexy Smurfette.
Regardless, I also ran on two Sundays in a row with my new friend, Tim who I'm faster than (which rules) for 6.5 miles each, and also midweek for 3.1 miles in preparation for the Brentwood Run and the Pride Run which I May make my long awaited return to participate in during May and June. I lifted weights on Thursday and Saturday and walked the dogs their usual 75 minute trip to nowhere almost every day. Also, I lifted to failure on my chest and back and legs but not shoulders.
Oh, I have a crush on a guy in Sacramento and I'm going there next weekend so I've been doing 70 pushups a day and 70 crunches when I wake up so tht when I see him he cant do anything but make love to me 70 times in front of the Folsom City Hall. Is that weird?
Diet:
I bought the 17 Day Diet because I am an asshole and love reading fitness books. This diet is not bullshit but...but...but...I was so cranky by day 2 I had to add more carbohydrates. I was only getting fruit and veggie carbs and at one point I called a coworker a dirty, stinking whore to her face. After I punched her. Then I realized she wasnt a coworker but a transient. I was dizzy with hunger. So I kept the breakfast they suggest (two eggs an orange and green tea) but added a scoop of protein to water (IsoPure chocolate mint) and Iced Coffee (black, like my men) and rolled the eggs in pepper and mustard seeds. For mid-day snack they recommend nonfat greek yogurt with blueberries (or another fruit) and stevia/truvia to taste. I use Splenda. Stevia is gross. for lunch i kept their plan, lettuce and chicken (I used spinach and arugula) but added a small scoop of brown rice or wheat toast with JR's BBQ sauce. For mid afternoon snack its an apple.
The hardest part of the day is from my apple to my dinner, or 4PM-7PM.
Dinner is the same as lunch, minus the toast/rice, add another scoop of protein.
And I will say, on Saturday and Sunday I went to Tender Greens and ate healthy but indulgent salads. I had a turkey burger Sunday.
So I modified by adding whole grains, and using Splenda, and cheating within reason on the weekends...
And I lost 2 pounds.
So I'm at 173 now. I feel pretty good, not deprived (except for 4-7PM). And weirdly, by eating less, I have more energy. And people are telling me I look skinnier...when I stand in front of them and say "DON'T I LOOK AMAZING?"
Exercise:
This week I went to Barry's bootcamp on Friday night as usual and found a sub, whom I hated. The normal teacher is this fellow David who is like a very deep voiced Southern twink and he is fantastic. His favorite phrase is "Let's go, Baby!" and he's very supportive and happy. We love David. His replacement was your typical overdeveloped pecs and skinny-calved dub-step himbo (homo/bimbo) who probably has an online profile claiming to be masculine looking for same, all the while planning his Halloween costume as a sexy Smurfette.
Regardless, I also ran on two Sundays in a row with my new friend, Tim who I'm faster than (which rules) for 6.5 miles each, and also midweek for 3.1 miles in preparation for the Brentwood Run and the Pride Run which I May make my long awaited return to participate in during May and June. I lifted weights on Thursday and Saturday and walked the dogs their usual 75 minute trip to nowhere almost every day. Also, I lifted to failure on my chest and back and legs but not shoulders.
Oh, I have a crush on a guy in Sacramento and I'm going there next weekend so I've been doing 70 pushups a day and 70 crunches when I wake up so tht when I see him he cant do anything but make love to me 70 times in front of the Folsom City Hall. Is that weird?
Diet:
I bought the 17 Day Diet because I am an asshole and love reading fitness books. This diet is not bullshit but...but...but...I was so cranky by day 2 I had to add more carbohydrates. I was only getting fruit and veggie carbs and at one point I called a coworker a dirty, stinking whore to her face. After I punched her. Then I realized she wasnt a coworker but a transient. I was dizzy with hunger. So I kept the breakfast they suggest (two eggs an orange and green tea) but added a scoop of protein to water (IsoPure chocolate mint) and Iced Coffee (black, like my men) and rolled the eggs in pepper and mustard seeds. For mid-day snack they recommend nonfat greek yogurt with blueberries (or another fruit) and stevia/truvia to taste. I use Splenda. Stevia is gross. for lunch i kept their plan, lettuce and chicken (I used spinach and arugula) but added a small scoop of brown rice or wheat toast with JR's BBQ sauce. For mid afternoon snack its an apple.
The hardest part of the day is from my apple to my dinner, or 4PM-7PM.
Dinner is the same as lunch, minus the toast/rice, add another scoop of protein.
And I will say, on Saturday and Sunday I went to Tender Greens and ate healthy but indulgent salads. I had a turkey burger Sunday.
So I modified by adding whole grains, and using Splenda, and cheating within reason on the weekends...
And I lost 2 pounds.
So I'm at 173 now. I feel pretty good, not deprived (except for 4-7PM). And weirdly, by eating less, I have more energy. And people are telling me I look skinnier...when I stand in front of them and say "DON'T I LOOK AMAZING?"
Tuesday, April 5, 2011
Why Not Try
It's not that i hate my body, because I don't--i think it's kinda sexy. I don't look like everyone else. I have a big chest but it's not dented with muscle like the steel on a Transformer. You can see my ab muscles if I take a deep breath and raise my hands high, but it's shielded by a layer of fat that has spread slowly since 2007 when I was at my leanest--which still carried a minimal but conspicuous tarp of loose skin. My legs are hairy but strong, and my butt got itself a ego.
But back in late 2008 I stepped on a scale and noticed something that really scared me, in a year and a half I'd gained 25 pounds.
See, by may of 2007 I had reached my lowest weight as an adult. 165 pounds. I was 12% body fat and I looked good, Baby. But after giving up fitness for new experiences, I lost track of my fitness. And worse, I was a full time personal trainer. I was 190 f'ing pounds.
And now, two and a half years later, after my heaviest moment since my major weight loss, I'm in a good place. I lost half of those 25 pounds i gained. But I'm not in a great place. But its not horrible. I no longer time the hours between meals. I only work out once a day, and if I feel like eating the whole sandwich I do...
But...
I think I could look better, and feel better, too.
I noticed it late last year when I was teaching spin class. I was the heaviest person in the class. And I was briefly ashamed of that. At 177 pounds and five foot ten I felt like a fraud. So I came home and got drunk to cut myself some slack. That was thanksgiving morning, so it felt appropriate.
I said to myself, "I just won't get heavier than this.". And I didn't. And I haven't.
But my curiosity is this...
Can I look and feel like I did back in 2007 without being the psychopath I was then? Can I manage the twists and turns of life and career and the dogs and boys and boredom and sadness and celebration with my health and fitness the way all of you normal people do? Or am I broken? Or is everything fine the way it is?
So, last month I started by going back to the gym 4 days a week, just to start to feel stronger. And I finally do. My cardio levels feel like 2007. im still in a weight class that isn't ideal--around 165 seems great, but I also do really feel ok with how I look.
What I don't feel comfortable with is my eating behavior. I still eat too much. I still don't always plan ahead. I still eat too often. But I'm much better off than I was in 2008.
So to my readers who followed me back in 2007 as I got psycho skinny, welcome back. Today, I am 175. My newest experiment is to see if I can get to 164.9 without losing my mind or making others miserable. Join me, won't you?
Here are my overall goals:
sweat like hell during every work out.
Do not cause myself pain by working out too much or too hard.
Get back to a 43 minute 10K run
Fit in my 31 jeans
Inspire others
Eat Portions planned in advance. Do not throw food surprise parties.
Be ok going to bed hungry.
Sleep better.
Be 164.9 pounds by around mid July
Get new headshots taken
Dance naked alone
Let's go!
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad.
But back in late 2008 I stepped on a scale and noticed something that really scared me, in a year and a half I'd gained 25 pounds.
See, by may of 2007 I had reached my lowest weight as an adult. 165 pounds. I was 12% body fat and I looked good, Baby. But after giving up fitness for new experiences, I lost track of my fitness. And worse, I was a full time personal trainer. I was 190 f'ing pounds.
And now, two and a half years later, after my heaviest moment since my major weight loss, I'm in a good place. I lost half of those 25 pounds i gained. But I'm not in a great place. But its not horrible. I no longer time the hours between meals. I only work out once a day, and if I feel like eating the whole sandwich I do...
But...
I think I could look better, and feel better, too.
I noticed it late last year when I was teaching spin class. I was the heaviest person in the class. And I was briefly ashamed of that. At 177 pounds and five foot ten I felt like a fraud. So I came home and got drunk to cut myself some slack. That was thanksgiving morning, so it felt appropriate.
I said to myself, "I just won't get heavier than this.". And I didn't. And I haven't.
But my curiosity is this...
Can I look and feel like I did back in 2007 without being the psychopath I was then? Can I manage the twists and turns of life and career and the dogs and boys and boredom and sadness and celebration with my health and fitness the way all of you normal people do? Or am I broken? Or is everything fine the way it is?
So, last month I started by going back to the gym 4 days a week, just to start to feel stronger. And I finally do. My cardio levels feel like 2007. im still in a weight class that isn't ideal--around 165 seems great, but I also do really feel ok with how I look.
What I don't feel comfortable with is my eating behavior. I still eat too much. I still don't always plan ahead. I still eat too often. But I'm much better off than I was in 2008.
So to my readers who followed me back in 2007 as I got psycho skinny, welcome back. Today, I am 175. My newest experiment is to see if I can get to 164.9 without losing my mind or making others miserable. Join me, won't you?
Here are my overall goals:
sweat like hell during every work out.
Do not cause myself pain by working out too much or too hard.
Get back to a 43 minute 10K run
Fit in my 31 jeans
Inspire others
Eat Portions planned in advance. Do not throw food surprise parties.
Be ok going to bed hungry.
Sleep better.
Be 164.9 pounds by around mid July
Get new headshots taken
Dance naked alone
Let's go!
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)